Get the best collection of the Funny Halloween Quotes for the Halloween 2016 wishes. Unique Funny Halloween Quotes and Sayings, Funny Halloween Quotes and Jokes, Funny Halloween Quotes for Facebook, Funny Halloween Quotes for Tumblr, Dirty Funny Halloween Jokes, Funny Halloween Quotes from Movies and much more. The halloween is famous for its activities like costumes, decorations, makeup and much more. That is the reason its a most fun loving festival in the world which celebrates around the world on 31 October by Christains and Non-Christains. You can send these funny and scary quotes and images to your friends, relatives, teacher and anyone to wish then a funny halloween. You can download these images from here and send it to your dear one on facebook, twitter, tumblr, linked in or anywhere you want. Don’t worry these images are free for download just go to images and then do right click after that go to “Save as Images” Then store the image on you gallery. And you can also copy these funny quotes from here and send it on Whatsapp, Facebook to your friends. Hope you gonna like this collection. Happy Halloween.
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Top 60 Funny Halloween Quotes and Jokes
Halloween fun is soon to begin. Hope your day is awesome and full of great treats. Have a bewitching night and a very happy Halloween.
Where do fashionable ghosts shop for sheets? ~ (Boo-tiques)
Just a reminder you’ve got plenty of time to plan a disappointing last-minute Halloween costume.
Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, “Never take candy from strangers.” And then they dressed me up and said, “Go beg for it.” I didn’t know what to do! I’d knock on people’s doors and go, “Trick or treat.” “No thank you.” – Rita Rudner
Last Halloween was bad for me. I got beat up. I went to a party dressed as a piñata.
– Jim Samuels
Halloween Funny Quotes for Tumblr
Trick or treat, I think you’re sweet on Halloween and always. May it be dreadfully creepy and scary and a whole lot of fun. Happy Halloween.
What do you call someone who puts poison in a person’s corn flakes? (A cereal killer)
I’d dress up as a Siri for Halloween if my life didn’t already entail being asked stupid questions all day.
There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world. -Jean Baudrillard
I learned something the other day. I learned that Jehovah’s Witnesses do not celebrate Halloween. I guess they don’t like strangers going up to their door and annoying them.
– Bruce Clark
Funny Costume idea and Images
Halloween wishes are being sent your way for a pleasantly frightful day and a delightfully magical night. May the spirit of Halloween be with you.
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? (Spare ribs)
In my life I’ll always respect our differences. Even if that only difference would be that you’re a zombie.
If a man harbors any sort of fear, it makes him landlord to a ghost. – Lloyd Douglas
I love Halloween. It’s the only night of the year I can wear a wedding dress without looking desperate.
Halloween Funny Quotes from Hollywood Movies
Somebody told me you were going to wear a witch costume this Halloween. You could have fooled me because I thought you were already wearing one. Just kidding with ya. Have a Happy Halloween.
What do you call a witch in the desert? (A sandwitch)
I am not sure but I hope that people mistakenly believe this crappy, last-minute, thrown-together Halloween costume is supposed to be Lady Gaga.
Fear has many eyes and can see things underground. – Miguel de Cervantes
Hair stylist: Gonna wear a costume for Halloween? Me: (Looking at my new haircut in the mirror) Probably something with a hood.
– John Lyon
Funny Halloween Quotes for Adults –
Trick or treat. You are so sweet, and it would be great if we could meet. Halloween greetings and best wishes for the Happiest Halloween ever.
What kind of streets do zombies like the best? (Dead ends)
Halloween is the only time I can easily convince others that my children are monsters. Without any legal issues.
Nina Willis Walter
The witches fly
Across the sky,
The owls go, “Who? Who? Who?”
The black cats yowl
And green ghosts howl,
“Scary Halloween to
These masked trick-or-treaters must be confused. They’re a day early, came in the back door, passed up the candy & took the big screen TV. ~ Just Bill
Funny Dirty Jokes for Halloween
In my search for the scariest looking costume, I realized nothing is more frightening than the clothes you wear. Okay, you win! Sincere Halloween wishes.
Who does Dracula get letters from? (His fang club)
The problem appears when you put more thought into your Halloween costume than into my career.
From ghoulies and ghosties and long leggety beasties and things that go bump in the night, Good Lord, deliver us! – Scottish Saying
I like to get my candy early for Halloween so I have plenty of time to buy more when I eat the first bag. – Molly
Halloween Funny Quotes for Facebook
I love the skeleton in your yard. Is it the one you’ve been hiding in your closet all these years? Chuckles. Have a spooktacular Halloween.
Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it. – Lindsay Lohan
The scariest part of Halloween is the people who work at Halloween stores.
Nothing on Earth so beautiful as the final haul on Halloween night. – Steve Almond
If I’m lazy and I can’t come up with a costume, I would just wear a slip and write ‘Freudian’ on it.
– Julia Stiles
Let the power of Halloween charge up your broomstick as well as your soul. Let the full moon bring all good things into your life.
“Here’s to Miley Cyrus for somehow making all Halloween costumes prior to 2013 look shockingly unslutty.” – Anonymous
Let’s pretend Halloween is different than any other dateless evening of sadly thrusting sugar down our throats.
Halloween is huge in my house and we really get into the “spirits” of things. ~ Dee Snider
If you’re in Alabama, don’t dress up as a nun, priest or rabbi for Halloween. Impersonating “a minister of any religion” is punishable by fine or jail. – Nina Vizcarrondo
Funny Halloween Quotes and Sayings
What I love most about Halloween is, I get to eat a lot of the candy my kids collect. Life is good. Halloween makes it better. Have a sweet one.
“It’s Halloween and hopefully you people that partied last night didn’t wake next to something scary this morning.” – Anonymous
Best of luck choosing a costume that’s not too clever for anyone to understand.
This Halloween the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him. – Conan O’Brien
When I was 12, I went as my mother for Halloween. I put on a pair of heels, went door to door, and criticized what everyone else was wearing. – Robin Bach
- You’re never too old to dress up on Halloween, and you’re never too old to get naked on a magical Halloween night. Have fun on Halloween, my friend.
- The older you get, the harder it is to find someone willing to share a horse costume with you.” – Anonymous
- I doubt that you know that we’re too cool to dress up for Halloween.
- There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. – George Carlin
- My wife likes to dress up like a witch for Halloween. Same as every other day. – Anonymous
- I heard you’d like to be Superman for Halloween. No offense, but I think you’d be better as Peter from Family Guy. Have an enjoyable and laid back Halloween.
- I’d dress up as Siri for Halloween if my life didn’t already entail being asked stupid questions all day. – Unknown
- If you meet a man in a vampire costume, it’s ok to greet him with “Hi, sucker
I would rather sit on a pumpkin and have it all to myself than be crowded on a velvet cushion. – Henry David Thoreau
- It’s that wonderful time of year again when the spiderwebs I’ve been too lazy to clean become functional decorations.
– Andy H.
- Do you know, some people believe the deceased come back from the dead to visit the living on Halloween? I hope all who come to visit you put a smile on your face this Halloween.
- “Halloween is for dressing as something you’re not. That’s why most girls go as sexy.”
- If you bought a Haloween costume, but need to have a special haircut, you better go to a boo-ty shop.
Everyone is a moon and has a dark side, which he never shows to anybody. – Mark Twain
- I awaken in the Halloween aftermath. Bed covered in candy wrappers. Looking down at my chocolate smeared hands I whisper, “What have I done?”
– Reverend Scott
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